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Parenting Sex Is Not a Sport Kim A Goodin A recent study suggests that 25% of teenage girls have been infected with an STD. That is 1 out of every 4 girls. Relationships and sex are not sports to be played like a game. Nor should young people look at them as a conquest or another notch to put in their belt. Sex changes your life and will literally determine what path your life takes. A relationship between a man and woman is NOT a game! It is a very serious, life-changing event. I believe and teach my daughters that a young man and woman should WAIT until after High School to start dating. In fact I go as far as to tell them that they should save their first kiss for the day they marry. Dating and having a relationship with someone of the opposite sex should be for the purpose of finding your partner for life. A teenager still in school is RARELY equipped or ready to be thinking about marriage. So they enter into a relationship solely based on feelings they don't understand or have under control yet. Instead they enter into a relationship for every reason BUT marriage. Today’s media seems to glorify teen relationships. As Christians, we are to live UP to the standards of God, not DOWN to the standards of this sinful world! Here are the two problems. First, in EVERY relationship you have, you give a piece of yourself away. By the time you finally get married, after say 3 to 10 relationships, that is how much LESS of you the one you are committing to spend your life with will get. The second problem is that going in and out of relationships means each new one becomes less special, breaking up becomes easier each time you do it, and you develop a mindset that you eventually take into marriage that makes it easy to get divorced when things don't go as you hoped. Marriage becomes little more than a legal date. To choose to enter into a serious boyfriend/girlfriend relationship before you are out of high school is a BAD CHOICE and can dramatically change your life forever. By the way, there is nothing magical about being out of High School. It is simply one major "life hurdle" out of the way that is part of the foundation of your life. There is PLENTY of time after High School to start dating. Remember there is absolutely NO situation when sex outside of marriage is acceptable to God. The Biblical word is fornication. It literally means any sex outside of marriage. Any boyfriend or girlfriend that is willing to have sex before marriage is NOT the person God has chosen for your life. It is simply not acceptable. Don't play games in this area! How far is too far sexually out side of marriage? Jesus said if you lust in your heart you have already committed adultery. If you have to ask how far you can go, you are already too far. Once you allow lust into your heart, God says you have already sinned. Let that be your standard. The physical act is simply the manifestation of the sin already committed in your heart. If you do not have a spiritual foundation to your relationship, how can you expect your marriage to survive the storms that come in every relationship? It is exactly like the story Jesus told at the end of Matthew Chapter 7. The marriage built on a spiritual foundation is like the house built on a rock. The marriage built on any other foundation is like the house built on the sand. God gave everyone free will to make choices. You can do what you want with your life. It is important for you to make wise, informed choices about things that will affect the outcome of your life. Each relationship before marriage becomes additional baggage to carry when you do marry. Yes in time memories fade but they still leave scars. Sometimes they will come back to haunt you. So as you begin dating for the purpose of finding your future spouse be careful to keep your relationship pure. Again sex outside of marriage is wrong and dating is for the sole purpose of finding the person who one day you will marry.
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